Movie Memories

Coming attraction -- A virtual me

CUE ANNOUNCER: "Virtual, from Dallas, Texas, it's Movie Memories With Larry Ratliff!"

Due to the COVID-19 pandemic, we have two problems here: One, I can't travel to your facility, corporate meeting or office function to perform my Movie Memories With Larry Ratliff presentations due to lock-downs, social distancing and such.  And two, your facility residents, meeting guests and office staff would really like something like Movie Memories With Larry Ratliff to entertain, inform and put a smile on everyone's faces.

Mic and me: It's a date

(Courtesy: Backdoor Comedy club)

There are scarier things you can do than take the stage of a comedy club for the first time and try to make paying customers laugh.  I just can't think of any right now.

Open Mic Night.  Call it the longest three minutes in show business; an eternity for some, a breeze for the gifted few.  All the great ones started this way somewhere.  One-liners and stories running through their minds over and over or scribbled on notepads as they nervously await their turn.

Time, more or less, has come today

While most people around much of the world and in the United States, except for Arizona and Hawaii, got an extra hour of sleep last night, I was up at 5 a.m.  Or was it 4?

Scooter, my 16-year-old dachshund (wiener dog to most) had to, uh, dash for the backdoor to do some serious business in the backyard.

Scootie, lovable, funny and loyal, knew exactly what time it was, and it had nothing to do with a clock.

But what about us humans?

Rush, rush, busy, busy: Great week

What a busy, crazy-good week at Camp Movie Memories last week.

Tuesday: "A Salute to the Great War Movies" at The Preston of the Park Cities.

Thursday: "'Casablanca' -- Hollywood's Classic Happy Accident" at the Southwest Women's Club meeting in Duncanville with Suellen offering a great assist (resulting in a 5-star review on Thumbtack.com).

Friday: "Hollywood's Hot Movie Scandals" before a large, enthusiastic crowd at the Canyon Creek North Garden Club in Plano.

Daddy Dearest

Father's Day was June 16.  So here's a question:  Who is the best movie father in cinematic history?

(Courtesy: Walt Disney)

We could certainly make a case for Geppetto, the elderly woodcarver of Pinocchio, Walt Disney Productions second full-length animated feature of 1940.

Geppetto wanted a son so badly that he carved one out of wood.  A Blue Fairy gave the puppet life and freed the lovable-but-gullible "boy" from his strings.  My nose would grow and grow if  I denied that Pinocchio made an indelible impression on me as a boy.

Crimes and Mister Meanies

You're probably familiar with the current crop of #Me Too movement suspects and convicted perpetrators. 

To mention just a few:  Major indie studio movie mogul Harvey Weinstein's trial for alleged sexual abuses of dozens of female complainants is coming up soon.  Excellent actor Kevin Spacey, facing charges for allegedly groping a teenage boy, has seen his "House of Cards" crumble.  And, sadly, Bill Cosby, formerly known as "America's Dad," is doing 3-to-10 in the slammer after being convicted on three counts of sexual assault.

What about those I'm calling the #Them Too perps?  I had a great time over at HarborChase of the Park Cities retirement community (in the Dallas area) recently with my Movie Memories presentation titled "Hollywood's Hot Movie Scandals."

Can you hear me now? Yes, indeedy

(Courtesy: sonnymelendrez.com)

My heartfelt thanks go out to legendary San Antonio-based radio personality and good friend Sonny Melendrez, the nicest guy I know and one of the finest keynote speakers in the U.S., for having me on his radio show Sunday morning.

I had the honor of serving as sidekick and movie guy on Sonny's top-rated San Antonio radio show a few years back. Now Sonny is back on the air with the all new "Sonny Melendrez Show" Sundays at 11 a.m. on San Antonio's 930 AM The Answer.  You can listen live by going to the station's website.

Sonny and I had a great time on his new show Sunday morning.  It was like old times, but fresh and new.

What, you missed it?  What if I said you didn't, not really?

Sonny, always on the cutting edge of radio and technology, archives his weekly shows as podcasts.  If you're in the mood to have some fun and find out how yours truly slowly morphed from a shy guy afraid to even raise his hand in class in high school to a nationally known film critic, public speaker and comedian, click on this link to hear the podcast.

The mother of reinvention

(Courtesy: VoyageDallas.com)

Have you ever pondered how you got to the place you're at in your life right now?  This minute?

I have more times than I care to share.  Usually it's in the wee hours of the night or early morning, when I'm tossing and turning in bed. I toss and turn sometime when I'm not in bed, which is not pleasant to witness and may be what "threw my back out" as they used to say.

My innermost self evaluations most often come down to "Why me?" or "Why now?" or the dreaded "Oh [EXPLETIVE DELETED], not now!"

Occasionally, though, there's a "Well, how about that. What a pleasant surprise." That's what today's contribution to literary history is all about.

Oscar rocks, rolls out 'non-hosts'

Original Queen members Brian May (guitar) and Roger Taylor (drums) with Adam Lambert. (Courtesy: spin.com)

For those of you who might have missed the non-hosted 91st Academy Awards Sunday night on ABC, here's all you need to know to keep up with the conversations at the iphone charging station or flavored-water machine today.  Of course we used to have these after-event debates around the water cooler, but try finding one of those these days.

Oh I see, your holiday event is coming up soon

I can't read your mind or anything, but I'm guessing you're looking for something a little different for your office, corporate or facility holiday gathering this year.

Well, look no further.  I have two suggestions for you, and they both just happen to involve, ahem, me.

Hooray/Son-of-a-!! -- Passing milestones, kidney stones

It's been quite a week around Movie Memories headquarters.  How often, for instance, does one pass a milestone and a kidney stone in the same day?

Not me and not the actual kidney stone, but it sure felt about that big. (Courtesy: www.pinterest)

Let's get the kidney stone out of the way first.  OK, it wasn't quite as huge as the photo you see, but it sure felt like it.  When did it happen, you ask?  Well, remember the other day when:

your cat jumped straight up and all its hair was standing on end,

when the dog's ears suddenly shot up and he began howling,

when you felt the Earth move a little bit under you,

when all the car alarms in the neighborhood were going off?

That was when.

Savoring Covenant Retirement Community memories

John and Ellie Milton with You Know Who

Be grumpy and/or glum about politics, the tragedies on the local newscasts almost every night and things going wrong at work or around the house if you want.

 I, on the other hand, am in the mood to celebrate.

Recently back from my Movie Memories with Larry Ratliff swing through the Chicago area, I'm savoring the fact that I was lucky enough to meet scores of very nice people, make some new friends and enjoy the best chicken salad sandwich of my life.

I'm free, and open to the public

If you like movies and fun, this is a semi-rare opportunity not to be missed.

So many of my Movie Memories with Larry Ratliff presentation events are private affairs.

Not this time, though.

Making 'Movie Memories' in Chi-Town

I'll never think of Chicago and its metro area as The Windy City, Second City or Chi-Town again.

From now on, Chicago is where Movie Memories with Larry Ratliff goes national.

The play-by-play's the thing

With apologies to the Beatles:

It was 50 years ago today
Professor Mercer taught the band to play-by-play

Two days have passed, and I still can't get over the fact that legendary sportscaster Bill Mercer sent an invite to join him for lunch to me and about 20 others from his 35-plus-year University of North Texas (UNT) broadcasting and sportscasting teaching span.

Mercer is famous in the sports world for wrapping his feet with plastic wrap in an attempt to stay warm enough to call the famous “Ice Bowl” NFL championship game between the Dallas Cowboys and Green Bay Packers in 1967, not to mention the Cowboys first two Super Bowl appearances.  He was in the booth when the Texas Rangers set up shop in Arlington and those slightly long of tooth will recall Mercer at the mic when "Studio Wrestling," taken seriously by many back in the 1960s or so, was taped before a small audience in the KRLD-TV (now KDFW) studios.

His credits are too numerous to mention.  Suffice it to say that the Texas Pro Baseball Hall of Fame, Texas Radio Hall of Fame and Dallas Press Club “Living Legend of North Texas Journalism” member who shared the broadcast booth with Don Drysdale when the Texas Rangers first hit the field was/is larger than life.

The thrill of the (Harbor) Chase

Making Movie Memories with (from left) Bridgette, Lisa and Glenda from HarborChase of the Park Cities.

I was humbled to be asked by Bridgette Walshe, executive director of HarborChase of the Park Cities, to present my "Life Lessons I've Learned at the Movies" Movie Memories presentation Tuesday afternoon at the historic Highland Park Village Theater in the trendy Park Cities area of Dallas near the George W. Bush Presidential Center and Southern Methodist University.

It's always a little special when I speak about the magic of the movies and my adventures interviewing internationally famous movie stars like Tom Hanks and Shirley MacLaine (just to namedrop a couple) and see the presentation spring to life on a huge movie theater screen.

R.I.P. -- Bob Polunsky

Bob Polunsky (Courtesy: www.pinterest.com)

As far as I know, longtime San Antonio film critic Bob Polunsky was never a "Robert."

Bob, who died at 85 this week in San Antonio, Texas, was just Bob, a kindred spirit in the love and appreciation of any film really worth watching.  He was also never shy about condemning a flawed movie for its shortcomings in a Bob Polunsky style dubbed "Flicker Footnotes."  Bob's reviews were direct and sometimes ruthless but always honest.

Bob was well established as The Guy when it came to film criticism in San Antonio when I arrived in 1983.  Bob wrote for the Express-News daily newspaper.  After a year of general entertainment reporting at the other daily newspaper in town, the now-dark San Antonio Light, I became "that other film critic in town."

Post-'Graduate' Hoffman is how old?

Oscar winner Dustin Hoffman and friend. (Courtesy: jewishcurrents.org)

Dustin Hoffman, one of my favorite actors and, I might add, interview subjects, turns 80 today.

'Scuse me, Mr. Father Time, but how can that be?

There's no denying it, though.  There it is in black-and-white (not to mention blue for linked words):  Dustin Lee Hoffman, born in Los Angeles on Aug. 8, 1937.

What ice cream addiction? Or 'Hey buddy, can you spare a spoon?'

True confession time:

When it comes to entertainment, the only thing I love more than movies in general are movies that make me laugh.  Really laugh!  Films like the Mel Brooks' masterpiece monster mash comedy Young Frankenstein (1974), Dr. Strangelove or:  How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Bomb (1964) and the first Toy Story (1995).  Movies like that.

The only thing I love more than movies that make me laugh is making people laugh through my stand-up comedy routine We Might As Well Laugh.

You must, you will remember this

Bottled-up sorrow: Rick (Humphrey Bogart) drowning in despair. (Courtesy: www.google.com)

I don't remember the first time I saw Casablanca, the mesmerizing romantic World War II drama classic starring Humphrey Bogart, Ingrid Bergman and Paul Henreid, but I remember the best.

It was in the mid-1970s.  If you wanted to see a movie back then you pretty much had to go to a movie house.  There was no Internet.  No cellphones.  No movies on demand on your Wi-Fi-connected TV.  Social media in a time that now seems locked in a galaxy far, far away meant chatting about a movie on the way home.