What if obituaries had to be honest?
Honest obits might go something like this:
Myra Ruth Littleberg
Funeral arrangements for Myra Ruth Littleberg, 91, of Ithaca, New York, who passed May 1, 2019 while reading a book at home, are pending at Ike’s Nondenominational Funeral Emporium on Hickory Street. Littleberg served as No. 2 Librarian for 25 years at the main Ithaca Library. She kept to herself, spoke in a whisper and was quick to “shush” loud talkers even outside the library. While researching Littleberg’s quiet life at work and at home with her three cats (Purrcy, Cuddles and Twerk), this reporter discovered, and thus must report, that Littleberg previously worked for years as a topless dancer who called herself Babs at the Check These Out Gentleman’s Club, located way down the gravel road on the shore of Cayuga Lake.