NBC's new latenight imaginarium

Jay Leno, dumped once by NBC when he was on top in his timeslot, is on the move again.

(Courtesy:  NBC-TV)

In times like these, when there's so much juicy gossip to chatter about, I wish I had a water cooler to, you know, gather around in my one-man office.

Actually, it's not an official office at all, just Bedroom No. 2.  That's of little consequence unless you're me and your wife really prefers that your office be in Bedroom No. 3, which is exactly one foot smaller and, from this office seat, a silly -- and monumentally troublesome -- move to even consider.

But that's not why I summoned this meeting. 

Chances are all you had to worry about this weekend was the outcome of an NFL playoff football game or two and, if you're me, wondering if your water pipes would hold up during what can best be described as a pesky frozen tundra that has gripped much of the nation and particularly, if you're me, North Texas.

Jay Leno, Conan O'Brien and Jimmy Fallon, on the other hand, spent the weekend pondering their fate.

NBC's trio of late-night hosts -- two comics and, well, Jimmy Fallon -- had until today, if published reports are correct, to decide if they'll go along with NBC's plan to yank Leno out of prime time, give him the 11:35 slot (Eastern Time) and push that goofy red-headed guy and Fallon, who used to be funny on "Saturday Night Live," back a half hour.

That, apparently, will appease local NBC affiliate executives, who would rather blame poor ratings on the strength, or, in this case, non-strength of lead-in programming than the substance of their own late news programming.

Alert readers will notice that I cited the Eastern Time Zone in Leno's proposed, or rather imposed move when I, in fact, reside in the Central Time Zone.  That's what we call in the biz (what biz?  I'm working from Bedroom No. 2 here.) a set-up.

In the Eastern Time Zone if Conan the Laugharian's show is pushed back a half hour, that'll mean "The Tonight Show" will be hitting the airwaves at 12:05 a.m.

There are many things we disagree about in this country:  Who should sit in the Oval Office?; Why don't those sweaty folks on "The Biggest Loser" wear more clothes? (Please, I'm begging you!) and, of course, whether my office should be in Bedroom No. 2 or 3.

I'm pretty sure we call all concur, though, that if "The Tonight Show" starts at 12:05 a.m., it should really be re-titled "The Really, Really Early Tomorrow Show."

Mull that over NBC, and make that bold bail-out move if you must.  Just remember to run it by all the namby-pamby local affiliates first.

Oh, and about my water pipes, I'm happy to report that unlike with the NBC shuffle, there have been no harmful leaks so far.

Wait, what's that gurgling noise?