I'm all for free enterprise, even when it comes to making a few bucks off dearly departed spouses to pay the rent and have a little left over for other essentials such as facelifts, body lowerings, tummy tucks, plastic breasts and, of course, lip-and-hip enhancement.
Heck, I hope when I'm gone my wife Suellen writes the book I've never had the guts to write (so far) about the bizarre path of a film critic trying to maintain his journalistic dignity while tip-toeing through the vague and veiled world of celebrity entertainment.
That said, I'm having more than a little trouble understanding why Maria Elena Holly, the Texas music icon's widow, has signed off on a virtual Buddy Holly stage tour set to kick off next year, according to a story in the Hollywood Reporter.
That's right, a hologram of Holly will likely sing -- sort of -- all the hits from Peggy Sue to That'll Be the Day. Who knows? In this age of social media and anything-goes-don't bother-to-check-your-sources reporting, a flickering image of Holly might just sell a ton of tickets.
According to the Hollywood Reporter article:
"Hologram USA is already working on the hologram-like performance of the rock and roll icon, as well as on a similar show around Liberace, which will debut in Las Vegas. Through the partnership with Buddy Holly Licensing, the company has access to music and images of Holly. Interactive elements involving the audience and back up band members are also being created."
Surely, Holly's widow is fighting this sort of tales-from-the-crypt nonsense to sell tickets. That's what you and me and any sane person who respects what the guy in glasses from West Texas accomplished in such a short time in the spotlight would think. Right?
We would be wrong about that.
"I am so excited that my partnership with Hologram USA on the Buddy Holly concert project will allow a new generation of fans to experience the thrill of seeing Buddy ‘live’ and in concert for the first time in many decades," Maria Elena Holly told the Hollywood Reporter.
So sorry, Mrs. Holly, but no one is going to see your late, great -- let's just go ahead and say legendary -- husband again live or even, as you put it, 'live.'
The music genius from Lubbock died along with The Big Bopper and Ritchie Valens in a tragic plane crash between Clear Lake, Iowa and Moorhead, Minn. almost exactly 56 years ago. Holly was only 22 years old.
In American Pie, Don McLean's meandering 1971 folk-rock anthem with almost hypnotic lyrics, McLean referred to Feb. 3, 1959 as "the day the music died."
I suggest we celebrate Holly best by just listening to his almost unbelievable collection of hits. And if you simply must see a semi-image of the man, seek out "The Buddy Holly Story," the 1978 biopic starring Gary Busey.
Yes, that Gary Busey; the human hologram who's pushing the Amazon Fire TV Stick in commercials and can't tell the difference between a Fire Stick and a seashell. Busey was on fire as Holly, by the way.
I know an Elvis Presley hologram concert is in the works as well. So why not go all the way? Bring back The Possum, the late, great George Jones, who died in April 2013. He could sing his signature hit, although it would have to be adjusted time wise.
You know, He Stopped Loving Her Almost Two Years Ago Today.
But Buddy Holly in a hologram concert? Line up and enjoy yourself if you must. A word of advice: Don't bother waiting around for an autograph.
As for me, that'll be the day-ay-ay when I ... when I ... don't know.
I've got nothing. Rave On, indeed.